My friendships have a certain symmetry at the moment: Alice is always asking me what she should do, and Nancy is always telling me what I should do.

I don&#39;t care who you are, you hear those boos.

I&#39;m not against vodka - they just asked us. They put out some story about us entertaining international celebrities with vodka, which of course wasn&#39;t true.

If you have read 6,000 books in your lifetime, or even 600, it's probably because at some level you find 'reality' a bit of a disappointment.

Written By Joe Queenan

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